I realized sometime at the beginning of Junior High School that to be successful (as defined by myself a 14 year old boy at the time) there were certain things required for success. I was determined I would be, do, or have those things. It seemed that with those characteristics people would like you, want, you or forgive you. I noticed that people including myself made allowances for indiscretions, made a fuss over even the simplest of accomplishments, and would do almost anything to be a part of this elite group. These are the things I decided I must have, “To be tall, have great hair, and incredibly handsome”. It is my personal observation I failed to accomplish even one of those critically important goals for success LOL.
As I now have a better view of the past (some 40 years later) it seems a bit humorous and sad all at the same time, to realize how much time and effort was put into a desire with so little return on investment. I would like to say that my adult life has been filled with avoiding some of those same choices, but anyone knows that’s not so. I now understand that it is sometimes necessary to struggle through what I want, only to realize what I wanted so much, was of no value.
As human beings we some how choose to listen to those ongoing appeals or messages that all we need to be_______ is ________. Just like what seemed to matter at 14 has not served me well at 54. When the focus is on self, it is a never ending search for fulfillment, completion, or satisfaction. Living requires a destination, somewhere to be, something to do, something to accomplish outside of self. A place a cause or goal, something to be a part of. A focus, or commitment, a purpose, and a meaningful direction.